The Viridian Suit
This is
loosely based on a 20th century business suit. It is designed to be different
but not so different that you would feel embarrased to wear it at dinner
parties, board meetings and so on. Plus there are several modifications to make
it suitable for the attitude and habits of the computing professional.
Special features
-
Many offices require their employees to wear some sort of security badge or ID
card. This jacket has a built-in window to insert such cards into. There is a
flap so you can cover the ID badge when outside the building (nothing looks
dorkier than a security badge when you are down at the local pub).
-
If you like to wear a headset for your mobile phone or phones for your walkman,
you can secure that dangling cable with the handy velcro tabs inside the
jacket.
-
A belt pouch is essential to carry your PDA, pager, mobile phone, portable CD
player etc. etc. This pouch does not come ready made, it comes as a kit with
some material and glue so you can customise it to the size and shape of your
personal equipment selection. It would be made of a suitable artificial
material such as synthetic chamois leather.
-
The shoulders can be fitted with optional solar cells woven into the fabric.
These should provide enough power to run your palmtop computer or recharge your
phone. If technology permits, these could be based on chloroplasts or some
other biological process. See
http://gumbo.bae.lsu.edu/~bpourcia/projects/biofuel.htm for one
possible method of constructing a biological fuel cell. (These are not supposed
to make it look like a Star Trek uniform - honest. It just turned out that
way!)
Other notable features
-
There is definitely no tie
-
The shirt is black to hide that gut that you have developed from 20 years of
sitting in front of computers.
-
The trousers are also black. No need to draw attention to your legs. They are
not important when you can travel anywhere, instantly via the net.
-
The lapel is rectangular. This is to suit the programmers patterns of thought.
Larry Wall postulated in his recent essay
that software people mainly follow an analytic, modernist frame of thought. The
rectangular shape of the lapels reflects this attitude. They also serve to make
it different from a regular lapel thus stating that the wearer is not a
conventional businessman.
-
The shoes are plain boots. Sensible and street-wise. If Viridian fashions
progress, they might be replaced with some sort of medieval or Robin Hood style
boot to reflect the computer programmer's love of fantasy role playing.
Viridian Couture
Competition Entry
by Adam Pierce
